meet little baby philip! this is minnie's baby. she is the second of my college friends to have a baby. ms. tina, the baby machine, has 2 sons already. philip looks a bit like minnie. very cute!

i've decided that i don't need to wait for my favorite crooner to come and visit where i live. i can go to him. mr. deke dickerson himself was visiting old ironsides in sacramento on saturday night. as always, he did not disappoint. i dragged ms. cinder up with me, put her in a dress, and boy howdy! did we have a great time! i wish that she lived closer. we would do things a lot more often. she is fun to hang with, and she always lets me choose what we do. who could ask for more?

once again i have made the mistake of asking jt to do something. you know, i'm not even really fond of him. i used to think he was a great guy, but now i know he is not. not at all, and yet, i keep asking him to do things. i've got to stop doing that. maybe it is because i dumped stephen. maybe i'm looking to fill a void. yes, stephen has left a big void. but jt isn't the one to fill it. he really isn't. i don't need another man in my life who wants me to have a crush on him. i've got mm and that is fine. and now that relationship is on terms i can handle, things are much better. i get to chat whenever i want, and he pushes back when i've gone too far. wait, he hasn't pushed back yet. and he hasn't really ignored anything i've said either. i know, i've figured out how to keep it under control. isn't that grand. i'm learning. and i can flirt really bad if i really want to. lucky for both of us that i'm better. i want to, but i don't. i know my limits. deke is in sacramento on saturday night, and i'm going to ditch the damn puppies and run! cinder is meeting me, or i'm meeting cinder, and i'm off to flirt with deke. i don't have to go by myself, which is always a bonus, and gotta love deke. yummy deke. why can't deke live around here so that i could see him all the time. nope, he's got to travel all the time. sharing that great music with everyone. what a wonderful guy. poor cinder. i hope she can handle it. me gushing over deke. it could be a problem.

so i did it... i put a profile on match.com and now, i've paid to use the service. i'm going to ask mar to help me start writing letters. i also need to get more pictures out there... i think that might help. this is nerve wracking. i've been looked at 18 times, but no letter. but 18 people were interested enough to read, that must be good, right?

this is me, i'm now on match trixie1167. i really need a date. can't you help me out?

so, mm got his package. he said that i rock. i'm not sure i rock. i so want him to be happy. i don't know how to do that. i know that i can't make anyone happy. i can help them to be happy, but they have to decide they want to be happy. i'm not sure that he is one of those people that want to be happy. does that make sense? like speed. i don't think he really wants to be happy. if he does, he sure hides it well. i miss him too. i miss having someone to hang with, but i don't miss the aggravation that came with him. i don't miss the 3-4 phone calls a day. and i don't miss feeling less than what someone wants. like i'm not worthy. i don't miss that at all. i want someone who wants to spend as much time with me as i do with him.

this weekend was all about my dad's puppies. doogie tried to run away when i was purchasing my girlscout cookies. i opened the door, and all the dogs went out to greet the leader and the girlscout. daisy took off to eat cat poop in the bushes, and then doogie took off in the other direction. since daisy knows where she lives, i left to chase after doogie. he was half way to safeway before the girlscout leader caught him. stupid dog. when i got back to the house, daisy was also back from her adventure. she was wondering why i shut the front door.